---

Roll out the red and F-22s
Record the regal proceedings
As I lumber a crooked path
To deliver strongman greetings

Watch me do the royal weave
	Weave       weave 	    this 	 endless 	carpet
Getting in my 10,000 steps
Before I tell Putin to stop it

Notice my carpet’s wider than his
My hair more pompadourus
A full orange head taller than him
I'll cease this day victorious

Jut the chin, tuck the tum
Turn and await the villain
Record it all for Switzerland
I’m going to stop the killin’ 

Oh look, is that really him
After these long and many years
Strutting like a manly man
I must hold back my tears

Clap clap clap it’s really him
Clad suitably in muted tie
Commanding the thin red strip
Oh cunning apple of my eye

Vladimir, my Putie
You’re such a bald white cutie
Climb into my Caddie beast
You stunning manipulative beauty

Just you and me, we’ll ride in back
And you shall have your way
Don’t mind the rest of them
For this is our special day

---

Skyrockets in flight
Afternoon delight

---

brought to you, and enabled, by Rule of Lawler