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Sugar fix the economy, 
my corn flakes, my Coke
Remix the tariffs,
the Fed and the woke

Obama’s sedatious
A foreign-born traitor
Biden’s an auto-penned
Socialist hater

Fly me to Scotland
Away from South Park
Serve me some haggis
So savory and dark

Behold my new golf club
Watch me swing
I’m a really good swinger
If that’s your thing

Game’s over, it’s time
To make me on offer
I’ll take it in crypto
Or cash in the coffer

How sweet it is
To be me, sweet me

brought to you, and enabled, by Rule of Lawler

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Photo: President Donald Trump waves on the golf course at Trump Turnberry resort in Turnberry, Scotland, Britain, July 26, 2025. Photo by Phil Noble/Reuters