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Never wrote a picture in my life,
Never drew those words or shamed my wife,
Never promised the things I said,
Never liked that guy, now it’s time I get fed

Up with you people
The truth shall be social
For me to declare,
No, not this, I really don’t care

Never heard anything so boring
Never met a girl with a nose-ring
Never knew how to dance, so what’s the chance

Let’s talk about other stuff, perhaps a Nobel
Turn on the TV, what’s that I smell?

Never saw J6ers harm a soul
Never heard Vladimir threaten a Pole
Never fired Powell though I’d do it tomorrow
Never considered the human sorrow

Never did what you’ve seen on the tape
Never missed a putt I didn’t take
Never said the things I did
Never did the things I said

Never saw anything like it before
Never back down, never be a bore
Now have some fresh Kool-Aid, 
Here, let me pour

brought to you, and enabled, by Rule of Lawler

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Photo: Donald Trump’s 2004 sketch of the New York skyline. (Heritage Auctions, HA.com)